Update subzero modsv1.1.2-beta.22

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@@ -0,0 +1,1661 @@
+1
+00:00:36,626 --> 00:00:38,992
+D'oh!
+
+2
+00:00:55,554 --> 00:00:57,044
+Stupid junk mail.
+
+3
+00:00:58,657 --> 00:01:00,591
+Yeah. Win this.
+
+4
+00:01:02,261 --> 00:01:04,525
+I'll see that he gets it.
+
+5
+00:01:04,596 --> 00:01:07,963
+How dumb do they think I am?
+Huh? A check?
+
+6
+00:01:08,033 --> 00:01:11,560
+One million dollars.
+
+7
+00:01:11,637 --> 00:01:16,131
+I'm rich!
+
+8
+00:01:18,777 --> 00:01:21,803
+Mr. Simpson, I can assure you,
+this check of yours is nonnegotiable.
+
+9
+00:01:21,880 --> 00:01:25,372
+Oh, yeah?
+Well, what makes you so damn sure?
+
+10
+00:01:25,451 --> 00:01:28,249
+See where it says "Void, void, void"
+and "This is not a check"?
+
+11
+00:01:28,320 --> 00:01:30,686
+"Cash value
+1 /20th of a cent."
+
+12
+00:01:30,756 --> 00:01:32,724
+- " Mr. Banker, do not honor."
+- Shut up.
+
+13
+00:01:32,791 --> 00:01:36,056
+I had a feeling it was
+too good to be true.
+
+14
+00:01:36,128 --> 00:01:39,495
+Every time you get a million dollars,
+something queers the deal.
+
+15
+00:01:39,565 --> 00:01:42,432
+I don't think real checks
+have exclamation points.
+
+16
+00:01:42,501 --> 00:01:44,992
+Well, at least we got
+a free sample of Reading Digest.
+
+17
+00:01:45,070 --> 00:01:49,006
+Marge, I never read
+a magazine in my life,
+and I'm not gonna start now.
+
+18
+00:01:49,074 --> 00:01:51,099
+Hey, a cartoon!
+
+19
+00:01:54,813 --> 00:01:56,838
+Ain't it the truth?
+
+20
+00:01:56,915 --> 00:01:58,644
+No, it's not the truth, Homer.
+
+21
+00:01:58,717 --> 00:02:01,652
+It's well-documented that women
+are safer drivers than men.
+
+22
+00:02:01,720 --> 00:02:04,883
+Oh, Marge, cartoons
+don't have any deep meaning.
+
+23
+00:02:04,957 --> 00:02:07,425
+They're just stupid drawings
+that give you a cheap laugh.
+
+24
+00:02:10,496 --> 00:02:12,430
+Hey, Einstein,
+put down your reading.
+
+25
+00:02:12,498 --> 00:02:14,022
+- It's lunchtime.
+- You go ahead.
+
+26
+00:02:14,099 --> 00:02:16,659
+Hey, you don't wanna eat?
+What you do, get one of them
+stomach staples?
+
+27
+00:02:16,735 --> 00:02:19,295
+As Tolstoy said
+in Quotable Notables...
+
+28
+00:02:19,371 --> 00:02:22,932
+"Give me learning, sir,
+and you may keep your black bread."
+
+29
+00:02:23,008 --> 00:02:25,476
+- Who is that bookworm, Smithers?
+- Homer Simpson, sir.
+
+30
+00:02:25,544 --> 00:02:28,240
+Simpson, eh?
+How very strange.
+
+31
+00:02:28,313 --> 00:02:31,441
+His job description
+clearly specifies an illiterate.
+
+32
+00:02:31,517 --> 00:02:36,113
+We now return to Troy McClure
+and Delores Montenegro
+in Preacher With a Shovel.
+
+33
+00:02:36,188 --> 00:02:39,180
+But Irrigation can save
+your people, Chief Smiling Bear.
+
+34
+00:02:39,258 --> 00:02:41,852
+Marge, look at them
+staring at that idiot box.
+
+35
+00:02:41,927 --> 00:02:45,055
+God forbid they would
+ever read something
+and improve their minds.
+
+36
+00:02:45,130 --> 00:02:47,428
+You've certainly taken
+a shine to that magazine.
+
+37
+00:02:47,499 --> 00:02:49,865
+It's not just
+one magazine, Marge.
+
+38
+00:02:49,935 --> 00:02:53,530
+They take hundreds of magazines,
+filter out the crap...
+
+39
+00:02:53,605 --> 00:02:57,166
+and leave you with something
+that fits right in your front pocket.
+
+40
+00:03:00,579 --> 00:03:03,810
+God! Those kids don't know
+what they're missing.
+
+41
+00:03:05,784 --> 00:03:07,979
+- Dad!
+- Hey, what gives, man?
+
+42
+00:03:08,053 --> 00:03:09,987
+the House of Representatives
+on C-SPAN,
+
+43
+00:03:10,055 --> 00:03:13,286
+and listen to an inspiring story
+of wilderness survival.
+
+44
+00:03:13,358 --> 00:03:15,485
+"Then I heard the sound...
+
+45
+00:03:15,561 --> 00:03:17,893
+"that all
+arctic explorers dread—
+
+46
+00:03:17,963 --> 00:03:20,727
+the pitiless bark
+of the sea lion."
+
+47
+00:03:20,799 --> 00:03:22,460
+He'll be killed!
+
+48
+00:03:22,534 --> 00:03:26,368
+Homer, he obviously got out alive
+if he wrote the article.
+
+49
+00:03:26,438 --> 00:03:30,101
+Don't be so—
+Oh, you're right.
+
+50
+00:03:34,079 --> 00:03:37,606
+Homey, put down your magazine
+for a minute.
+
+51
+00:03:37,683 --> 00:03:41,210
+- Huh?
+- I thought you might wanna snuggle.
+
+52
+00:03:41,286 --> 00:03:46,383
+That reminds me.
+"Seven ways to spice up
+your marriage."
+
+53
+00:03:46,458 --> 00:03:50,394
+Marge, "You have a nice body...
+
+54
+00:03:50,462 --> 00:03:54,296
+and if you'd like to
+see me in a costume,
+you have only to ask."
+
+55
+00:03:54,366 --> 00:03:55,958
+Thank you, Homey.
+
+56
+00:03:56,034 --> 00:03:59,663
+Wow! Little meat loaf men!
+
+57
+00:04:00,873 --> 00:04:02,738
+Where did you get
+the idea for this, Mom?
+
+58
+00:04:02,808 --> 00:04:06,574
+Where do you think?
+This baby never steers
+you wrong, and it was free!
+
+59
+00:04:06,645 --> 00:04:09,136
+- Free.
+- It certainly has enriched our lives.
+
+60
+00:04:09,214 --> 00:04:13,014
+Wow. "Win a trip
+to Washington, D.C.
+
+61
+00:04:13,085 --> 00:04:15,952
+All expenses paid.
+V.I.P. tour."
+
+62
+00:04:16,021 --> 00:04:19,320
+- Oh, it's for kids.
+- Wait, Dad!
+
+63
+00:04:20,726 --> 00:04:23,695
+An essay contest.
+"Children under 12.
+
+64
+00:04:23,762 --> 00:04:28,165
+Three-hundred words,
+fiercely pro-American."
+Sounds interesting.
+
+65
+00:04:28,233 --> 00:04:31,225
+Bart, maybe this is something
+you'd like to do too.
+
+66
+00:04:31,303 --> 00:04:35,501
+Mom, it's a nice thought,
+but we both know that
+this is the pony to bet on.
+
+67
+00:04:37,042 --> 00:04:41,672
+What would Ben Franklin say
+if he were alive today?
+
+68
+00:04:41,747 --> 00:04:44,477
+He'd say, uh...
+
+69
+00:04:44,550 --> 00:04:46,142
+"Think of a better opening."
+
+70
+00:04:46,218 --> 00:04:48,618
+- How's it going, honey?
+- Not very well.
+
+71
+00:04:48,687 --> 00:04:52,054
+Well, when I used to
+get stuck like this,
+I'd go for a bike ride.
+
+72
+00:04:52,124 --> 00:04:55,116
+- Do kids go
+on bike rides anymore?
+- Yes!
+
+73
+00:04:55,193 --> 00:04:58,754
+I don't know.
+I thought maybe bikes
+weren't cool anymore.
+
+74
+00:04:58,830 --> 00:05:03,028
+- Do kids still use that word "cool"?
+- Yes, Mom!
+
+75
+00:05:11,009 --> 00:05:14,376
+Okay, America, inspire me.
+
+76
+00:05:16,848 --> 00:05:19,146
+Wow, a bald eagle.
+
+77
+00:05:22,120 --> 00:05:24,611
+Hmm.
+
+78
+00:05:24,690 --> 00:05:26,749
+Thanks for driving me
+to the contest, Dad.
+
+79
+00:05:26,825 --> 00:05:29,988
+Sweetheart, there's nothing
+I wouldn't do for that magazine.
+
+80
+00:05:30,062 --> 00:05:33,998
+"So burn the flag if you must,
+but before you do...
+
+81
+00:05:34,066 --> 00:05:36,159
+"you better burn
+a few other things.
+
+82
+00:05:36,234 --> 00:05:38,532
+"You better burn your shirt
+and your pants.
+
+83
+00:05:38,604 --> 00:05:40,970
+" Be sure to burn
+your TV and car.
+
+84
+00:05:41,039 --> 00:05:43,405
+"Oh, yes, and don't forget
+to burn your house...
+
+85
+00:05:43,475 --> 00:05:47,377
+"because none of those things
+could exist without six white stripes...
+
+86
+00:05:47,446 --> 00:05:51,041
+seven red stripes
+and a hell of a lot of stars."
+
+87
+00:05:51,116 --> 00:05:52,811
+Thank you very much.
+
+88
+00:05:52,884 --> 00:05:55,614
+Yeah! Damn right!
+
+89
+00:05:58,690 --> 00:06:03,559
+" Recipe for a free country:
+Mix one cup liberty with
+three teaspoons of justice.
+
+90
+00:06:03,629 --> 00:06:06,757
+Add one informed electorate.
+Baste well with veto power."
+
+91
+00:06:09,067 --> 00:06:12,628
+" My back is spineless.
+My belly is yellow.
+
+92
+00:06:12,704 --> 00:06:14,729
+I am the American nonvoter."
+
+93
+00:06:16,975 --> 00:06:20,433
+"Stir in two cups of checks.
+Sprinkle liberally with balances."
+
+94
+00:06:22,881 --> 00:06:25,941
+" Ding, dong. The sounds
+of the Liberty Bell.
+
+95
+00:06:26,018 --> 00:06:29,044
+Ding— freedom.
+Dong— opportunity.
+
+96
+00:06:29,121 --> 00:06:32,716
+Ding— excellent schools.
+Dong— quality hospitals."
+
+97
+00:06:35,193 --> 00:06:39,152
+"When America was born
+on that hotJuly day in 1 77 6...
+
+98
+00:06:39,231 --> 00:06:43,668
+"the trees in Springfield Forest
+were tiny saplings,
+trembling towards the sun.
+
+99
+00:06:43,735 --> 00:06:45,794
+"And as they were nourished
+by Mother Earth...
+
+100
+00:06:45,871 --> 00:06:48,533
+"so too did our fledgling nation
+find strength...
+
+101
+00:06:48,607 --> 00:06:51,474
+"in the simple ideals
+of equality and justice.
+
+102
+00:06:51,543 --> 00:06:55,240
+"Who would have thought
+such mighty oaks
+or such a powerful nation...
+
+103
+00:06:55,313 --> 00:06:59,477
+could grow out of something
+so fragile, so pure?"
+
+104
+00:06:59,551 --> 00:07:01,644
+Thank you.
+
+105
+00:07:03,055 --> 00:07:05,023
+- What do you think?
+- It's good.
+
+106
+00:07:05,090 --> 00:07:06,990
+A little too good
+for an eight-year-old.
+
+107
+00:07:07,059 --> 00:07:10,995
+Me thinks I detect
+the sickly scent of the daddy.
+
+108
+00:07:11,063 --> 00:07:15,693
+Mr. Simpson, I'd like to
+ask you a few questions
+about your daughter's essay.
+
+109
+00:07:15,767 --> 00:07:18,827
+- Lisa, will you excuse us?
+- Okay.
+
+110
+00:07:18,904 --> 00:07:21,498
+"We the purple"?
+What the hell was that?
+
+111
+00:07:21,573 --> 00:07:24,303
+- Are you a professional writer?
+- Mm-mmm.
+
+112
+00:07:24,376 --> 00:07:26,435
+Are you interested in
+politics or government?
+
+113
+00:07:26,511 --> 00:07:28,172
+I don't know.
+
+114
+00:07:28,246 --> 00:07:31,807
+- Are you interested in anything?
+- I don't know.
+
+115
+00:07:31,883 --> 00:07:35,250
+- Could you touch your nose for me? Hmm.
+- Mm. Hmm.
+
+116
+00:07:37,522 --> 00:07:40,184
+Lisa, after meeting
+your father...
+
+117
+00:07:40,258 --> 00:07:42,886
+I've decided to award you
+an additional five points.
+
+118
+00:07:42,961 --> 00:07:46,556
+Congratulations.
+You and your family
+are going to Washington.
+
+119
+00:07:46,631 --> 00:07:48,963
+Wa-hoo!
+Who would have guessed...
+
+120
+00:07:49,034 --> 00:07:52,165
+reading and writing
+would pay off?
+
+121
+00:08:01,074 --> 00:08:04,100
+- Yes, sir, can I get you something?
+- Playing cards, notepad...
+
+122
+00:08:04,177 --> 00:08:06,611
+aspirin, sewing kit,
+pilot's wing pin...
+
+123
+00:08:06,679 --> 00:08:08,977
+propeller-shaped swizzle stick,
+sleeping mask...
+
+124
+00:08:09,048 --> 00:08:12,245
+- and anything else
+I've got coming to me.
+- I'll see what I can do.
+
+125
+00:08:12,318 --> 00:08:15,287
+Hmm.
+
+126
+00:08:15,354 --> 00:08:18,619
+Steward!
+
+127
+00:08:18,691 --> 00:08:21,683
+Little boy, I bet you'd like to
+visit the cockpit.
+
+128
+00:08:21,761 --> 00:08:23,285
+Ooh-ooh, baby!
+
+129
+00:08:23,362 --> 00:08:26,798
+And this control stick is like
+the handlebars on your tricycle.
+
+130
+00:08:26,866 --> 00:08:28,959
+Now, would you
+like to see where
+we hang our coats?
+
+131
+00:08:29,035 --> 00:08:31,799
+No, thank you.
+I'd rather push
+this button. Oops!
+
+132
+00:08:31,871 --> 00:08:34,101
+No!
+
+133
+00:08:34,173 --> 00:08:36,869
+We're all gonna die!
+
+134
+00:08:39,645 --> 00:08:45,481
+Look, Marge, that guy has
+the same last name we do. Taxi.!
+
+135
+00:08:46,886 --> 00:08:49,753
+Oh, look, Homer,
+the I.R.S.
+
+136
+00:08:49,822 --> 00:08:53,485
+- Boo!
+- Oh, boo yourself.
+
+137
+00:08:53,559 --> 00:08:57,154
+Here we are, kids.
+The Watergate.
+
+138
+00:09:07,740 --> 00:09:09,674
+Hey!
+
+139
+00:09:09,742 --> 00:09:13,303
+Homer, look.!
+They give you a shower cap...
+
+140
+00:09:13,379 --> 00:09:16,678
+and body gel
+and bathrobes.
+
+141
+00:09:16,749 --> 00:09:19,547
+And a welcoming mint
+on your pillow.
+
+142
+00:09:19,619 --> 00:09:23,521
+Wow, a shoehorn.
+Just like in the movies.
+
+143
+00:09:23,589 --> 00:09:27,787
+Shoe goes on, shoe goes off,
+shoe goes on, shoe goes off.
+
+144
+00:09:27,860 --> 00:09:30,124
+Shoe goes on,
+shoe goes off.
+
+145
+00:09:30,196 --> 00:09:32,130
+Hey, I call first bedsies.
+
+146
+00:09:32,198 --> 00:09:35,690
+Bart, there's no such thing
+as first bedsies.
+You just made that up.
+
+147
+00:09:35,768 --> 00:09:37,702
+Well, okay,
+which one do you want?
+
+148
+00:09:37,770 --> 00:09:40,796
+I... want... that one.
+
+149
+00:09:40,873 --> 00:09:43,307
+Really?
+You want that one?
+
+150
+00:09:43,376 --> 00:09:45,139
+It's all yours.
+Whatever you say.
+
+151
+00:09:45,211 --> 00:09:47,543
+- Why? What's wrong with it?
+- Nothing.
+
+152
+00:09:47,613 --> 00:09:49,877
+- Have a good night's sleep, Lisa.
+- No, really, what?
+
+153
+00:09:49,949 --> 00:09:51,883
+- Nothing.
+- What did you do to it?
+
+154
+00:09:51,951 --> 00:09:54,317
+- Nothing.
+- Mom!
+
+155
+00:09:56,489 --> 00:10:00,255
+What the— D'oh!
+Stupid welcoming mint!
+
+156
+00:10:00,326 --> 00:10:03,591
+- Hello?
+- Good morning.
+This is your wake-up call.
+
+157
+00:10:03,663 --> 00:10:06,029
+Wake-up call?
+It's 2:00 a.m.
+
+158
+00:10:06,098 --> 00:10:08,032
+Sorry, fatso.
+
+159
+00:10:11,237 --> 00:10:14,229
+Free food?
+
+160
+00:10:14,307 --> 00:10:18,903
+Lisa, I'm Faith Crowley—
+patriotism editor of Reading Digest.
+
+161
+00:10:18,978 --> 00:10:20,912
+Oh, I love your magazine.
+
+162
+00:10:20,980 --> 00:10:23,278
+My favorite section is
+" How to Increase Your Word Power."
+
+163
+00:10:23,349 --> 00:10:27,979
+That thing is really,
+really, really... good.
+
+164
+00:10:28,054 --> 00:10:32,388
+Well, good.
+Lisa, I'd like you to meet
+some other finalists.
+
+165
+00:10:32,458 --> 00:10:35,586
+- This is Trong Van Dinh
+and Maria Dominguez.
+- Hello.
+
+166
+00:10:35,661 --> 00:10:38,129
+Maria is the National
+Spelling Bee Champion.
+
+167
+00:10:38,197 --> 00:10:41,257
+And Trong has won both
+the Westinghouse Talent Search...
+
+168
+00:10:41,334 --> 00:10:44,667
+and the NFL Punt,
+Pass and Kick Competition.
+
+169
+00:10:44,737 --> 00:10:48,673
+Have either of you ever run
+into any problems because
+of your superior ability?
+
+170
+00:10:48,741 --> 00:10:52,268
+- Hmm?
+- Sure, I guess.
+- Oh, me too!
+
+171
+00:10:53,646 --> 00:10:55,807
+These are special
+V.I.P. badges.
+
+172
+00:10:55,881 --> 00:10:57,906
+They'll get you into places
+other tourists never see.
+
+173
+00:10:57,984 --> 00:11:01,647
+- Miss, what does the "I" stand for?
+- Important.
+
+174
+00:11:01,721 --> 00:11:04,713
+- Oh! How about the "V"?
+- Very.
+
+175
+00:11:04,790 --> 00:11:07,418
+- Oh! And, miss,
+just one more question.
+- Person.
+
+176
+00:11:07,493 --> 00:11:09,427
+Ah!
+
+177
+00:11:09,495 --> 00:11:11,759
+- What does the "I" stand for again?
+- Oh!
+
+178
+00:11:16,335 --> 00:11:21,329
+- "On this spot, Richard Nixon
+bowled back-to-back 300 games."
+- Yeah, right.
+
+179
+00:11:21,407 --> 00:11:25,241
+Wow, the president's bathroom.
+
+180
+00:11:28,614 --> 00:11:31,515
+- Do you mind?
+- Barbara Bush!
+
+181
+00:11:31,584 --> 00:11:34,417
+Oh, you have
+those damn badges.
+
+182
+00:11:34,487 --> 00:11:39,083
+Okay. This tub
+was installed in 1894.
+
+183
+00:11:40,159 --> 00:11:43,151
+Mmm. Money.
+
+184
+00:11:45,831 --> 00:11:47,856
+Hey, watch it, chief.
+
+185
+00:11:47,933 --> 00:11:51,164
+Folks, we print more than
+18 million bills a day.
+
+186
+00:11:51,237 --> 00:11:53,762
+Oh, and in case
+you were wondering...
+
+187
+00:11:53,839 --> 00:11:56,034
+no, we don't give out
+free samples.
+
+188
+00:11:58,110 --> 00:12:00,044
+Lousy, cheap country.
+
+189
+00:12:06,018 --> 00:12:08,486
+Bart, get out
+of The Spirit of St. Louis.!
+
+190
+00:12:11,357 --> 00:12:15,123
+Hey, what's so funny.
+
+191
+00:12:15,194 --> 00:12:18,755
+Oh, Marge, grow up!
+
+192
+00:12:20,299 --> 00:12:23,325
+Congressman, this is, uh,
+Springfield National Forest.
+
+193
+00:12:23,402 --> 00:12:27,133
+- Now, basically, what we
+wanna do is cut her down.
+- Uh-huh.
+
+194
+00:12:27,206 --> 00:12:29,834
+As you can see
+in our artist's rendition,
+it's full of old growth...
+
+195
+00:12:29,909 --> 00:12:31,968
+just aging
+and festering away.
+
+196
+00:12:32,044 --> 00:12:34,740
+In comes our logging company
+to thin out the clutter.
+
+197
+00:12:34,814 --> 00:12:37,476
+It's all part of nature's,
+you know, cycle.
+
+198
+00:12:37,550 --> 00:12:39,484
+Well, Jerry, you're a whale
+of a lobbyist, and, uh...
+
+199
+00:12:39,552 --> 00:12:42,385
+I'd like to give you a logging permit,
+I would, but, uh...
+
+200
+00:12:42,455 --> 00:12:44,787
+this isn't like
+burying toxic waste.
+
+201
+00:12:44,857 --> 00:12:47,325
+People are gonna notice
+those trees are gone.
+
+202
+00:12:49,061 --> 00:12:50,995
+Eh, Congressman, this is where
+it gets awkward.
+
+203
+00:12:51,063 --> 00:12:55,500
+I— I never quite know
+how to put this.
+
+204
+00:12:55,568 --> 00:12:57,502
+- I just want to—
+- Offer me a bribe?
+
+205
+00:13:01,073 --> 00:13:03,541
+Oh, what is it?
+
+206
+00:13:03,609 --> 00:13:06,476
+It's that little girl from Springfield
+who wrote the essay.
+
+207
+00:13:06,545 --> 00:13:08,376
+- Could be a good photo-op.
+- Sure, fine.
+
+208
+00:13:08,447 --> 00:13:10,915
+- So, uh, where do we—
+- Duh, duh, duh, Not here.
+
+209
+00:13:10,983 --> 00:13:15,920
+I've got a little place that
+I use for these, uh, matters.
+Call me tonight.
+
+210
+00:13:15,988 --> 00:13:20,220
+- Well, hi there.
+You must be Lisa Simpson.
+- Hello, sir.
+
+211
+00:13:20,292 --> 00:13:23,227
+Lisa, you're a doer,
+and who knows, maybe someday...
+
+212
+00:13:23,295 --> 00:13:25,229
+you'll be a congressman
+or a senator.
+
+213
+00:13:25,297 --> 00:13:27,026
+We have quite a few
+women senators, you know.
+
+214
+00:13:27,099 --> 00:13:30,000
+Only two. I checked.
+
+215
+00:13:30,069 --> 00:13:32,731
+You're a sharp one.
+Well, how about a few pictures?
+
+216
+00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:38,601
+Tot shot always plays
+in the sticks.
+
+217
+00:13:38,677 --> 00:13:40,668
+Oh, isn't that nice?
+
+218
+00:13:40,746 --> 00:13:42,680
+Now there is
+a politician who cares.
+
+219
+00:13:42,748 --> 00:13:46,445
+If I ever vote,
+it'll be for him.
+
+220
+00:13:50,689 --> 00:13:52,850
+Mom?
+
+221
+00:13:52,925 --> 00:13:55,621
+Lisa, the contest
+isn't for three hours.
+
+222
+00:13:55,694 --> 00:13:57,889
+I'm too excited to sleep.
+
+223
+00:13:57,963 --> 00:14:00,227
+Anyone up for the
+Winifred Beecher Howe Memorial?
+
+224
+00:14:00,299 --> 00:14:02,859
+- Who's that?
+- An early crusader for women's rights.
+
+225
+00:14:02,935 --> 00:14:05,961
+She led the Floor Mop
+Rebellion of 1 91 0.
+
+226
+00:14:06,038 --> 00:14:09,132
+Later, she appeared on
+the highly unpopular
+75-cent piece.
+
+227
+00:14:09,208 --> 00:14:13,440
+Okay, but you don't know
+what you're missing.
+
+228
+00:14:17,416 --> 00:14:19,680
+Oh!
+
+229
+00:14:19,752 --> 00:14:22,152
+"I will iron your sheets
+when you iron out...
+
+230
+00:14:22,221 --> 00:14:24,348
+the inequities
+in your labor laws."
+
+231
+00:14:24,423 --> 00:14:26,914
+Amen, sister.
+
+232
+00:14:26,992 --> 00:14:28,926
+I told you
+no one ever came here.
+
+233
+00:14:28,994 --> 00:14:32,862
+So, Bob, where do we stand
+on Springfield Forest?
+
+234
+00:14:32,932 --> 00:14:35,696
+Do I get my logging permit?
+
+235
+00:14:35,768 --> 00:14:39,704
+Well, let me put it
+this way, Jerry. Timber!
+
+236
+00:14:44,810 --> 00:14:47,142
+- What a pooch.
+- Woof woof!
+
+237
+00:15:01,296 --> 00:15:05,665
+How can I read my essay now?
+I don't believe my own words.
+
+238
+00:15:09,738 --> 00:15:12,332
+Honest Abe—
+he'll show me the way.
+
+239
+00:15:18,080 --> 00:15:20,708
+- Mr. Lincoln—
+- Mr. Lincoln,
+I need your advice.
+
+240
+00:15:20,783 --> 00:15:22,944
+What can I do to make this
+a better country?
+
+241
+00:15:23,018 --> 00:15:24,952
+Is this a good time
+to buy a house?
+
+242
+00:15:25,020 --> 00:15:27,887
+- I can't get my boy to brush.
+- Would I look good
+with a mustache?
+
+243
+00:15:27,956 --> 00:15:31,187
+I tried using turpentine,
+but that just made it worse.
+
+244
+00:15:33,629 --> 00:15:36,189
+Mr. Lincoln?
+Mr. Lincoln?
+
+245
+00:15:36,265 --> 00:15:40,224
+My name is Lisa Simpson,
+and I have a problem!
+
+246
+00:15:43,305 --> 00:15:46,035
+Mr. Jefferson,
+my name is Lisa Simpson...
+
+247
+00:15:46,108 --> 00:15:48,406
+- and I have a problem.
+- I know your problem.
+
+248
+00:15:48,477 --> 00:15:50,570
+The Lincoln Memorial
+was too crowded.
+
+249
+00:15:50,646 --> 00:15:53,581
+- Sorry, sir. It's just—
+- No one ever comes to see me.
+
+250
+00:15:53,649 --> 00:15:56,516
+I don't blame them.
+I never did anything important—
+
+251
+00:15:56,585 --> 00:15:58,576
+just the Declaration
+of Independence...
+
+252
+00:15:58,654 --> 00:16:01,145
+the Louisiana Purchase,
+the dumbwaiter—
+
+253
+00:16:01,223 --> 00:16:03,589
+Maybe I should be going.
+I caught you at a bad time.
+
+254
+00:16:03,659 --> 00:16:07,425
+Wait! Please don't go.
+I get so lonely.
+
+255
+00:16:27,850 --> 00:16:31,149
+The truth must be told.
+
+256
+00:16:35,491 --> 00:16:39,018
+Oh.! Oh.! Oh.! Oh.!
+
+257
+00:16:39,094 --> 00:16:41,722
+Rudy, my man,
+you're a miracle worker.
+
+258
+00:16:41,797 --> 00:16:44,630
+Your laundry, sir.
+
+259
+00:16:44,700 --> 00:16:46,691
+There you go.
+Buy yourself something nice.
+
+260
+00:16:46,768 --> 00:16:50,761
+- Thank you.
+- Bart, are you ready to
+go to—
+
+261
+00:16:50,839 --> 00:16:52,864
+- I'll room service you.!
+- Before you kill me...
+
+262
+00:16:52,941 --> 00:16:55,341
+remember, this trip
+is all expenses paid.
+
+263
+00:17:11,760 --> 00:17:15,025
+- Thank you.
+- Oh, this guy is awful.
+
+264
+00:17:15,097 --> 00:17:17,031
+I know, honey,
+but just sit still.
+
+265
+00:17:18,500 --> 00:17:21,435
+Welcome, everyone,
+to the awards luncheon.
+
+266
+00:17:21,503 --> 00:17:24,165
+I'd like to introduce
+our distinguished judges...
+
+267
+00:17:24,239 --> 00:17:26,298
+who will select
+our scholarship winner.
+
+268
+00:17:26,375 --> 00:17:29,708
+Former Redskins great
+Alonzo Flowers...
+
+269
+00:17:29,778 --> 00:17:32,770
+perennial third-party candidate
+Wilson DeFarge...
+
+270
+00:17:32,848 --> 00:17:35,146
+Senate page Brad Fletcher...
+
+271
+00:17:35,217 --> 00:17:37,447
+skin care consultant Rowena...
+
+272
+00:17:37,519 --> 00:17:41,216
+and wealthy gadabout
+Chilton Gaines.
+
+273
+00:17:41,290 --> 00:17:45,386
+Our first essayist
+will be Lisa Simpson.
+
+274
+00:17:45,460 --> 00:17:48,952
+Lisa? Lisa?
+
+275
+00:17:49,031 --> 00:17:53,058
+Oh, there she is.
+
+276
+00:17:53,135 --> 00:17:55,831
+Lisa Simpson
+will now read her essay—
+
+277
+00:17:55,904 --> 00:17:58,896
+I would like to read
+a different essay, if I may?
+
+278
+00:17:58,974 --> 00:18:01,204
+Um— Okay.
+
+279
+00:18:03,345 --> 00:18:06,439
+The city of Washington was built
+on a stagnant swamp...
+
+280
+00:18:06,515 --> 00:18:10,474
+some 200 years ago
+and very little has changed.
+
+281
+00:18:10,552 --> 00:18:13,544
+It stank then
+and it stinks now.
+
+282
+00:18:13,622 --> 00:18:17,786
+Only today, it is
+the fetid stench of corruption
+that hangs in the air.
+
+283
+00:18:17,859 --> 00:18:20,521
+Cool! A ruckus.
+
+284
+00:18:23,198 --> 00:18:25,962
+And who did I see
+taking a bribe...
+
+285
+00:18:26,034 --> 00:18:28,525
+but the honorable
+Bob Arnold.
+
+286
+00:18:28,604 --> 00:18:31,072
+But don't worry, Congressman...
+
+287
+00:18:31,139 --> 00:18:35,269
+I'm sure you can buy
+all the votes you need
+with your dirty money.
+
+288
+00:18:35,344 --> 00:18:39,110
+And this will be one nation
+under the dollar...
+
+289
+00:18:39,181 --> 00:18:42,514
+with liberty
+and justice for none.
+
+290
+00:18:47,656 --> 00:18:50,056
+Senator, there's a problem
+at the essay contest.
+
+291
+00:18:50,125 --> 00:18:52,559
+- Please, son, I'm very busy.
+- A little girl...
+
+292
+00:18:52,628 --> 00:18:55,688
+- is losing faith in democracy.
+- Good Lord!
+
+293
+00:19:00,402 --> 00:19:04,338
+Congressman, we want to drill for
+oil in Teddy Roosevelt's head.
+
+294
+00:19:04,406 --> 00:19:07,842
+Well— Teddy who?
+
+295
+00:19:07,909 --> 00:19:10,537
+Congressman...
+
+296
+00:19:10,612 --> 00:19:12,546
+you're under arrest.
+
+297
+00:19:16,518 --> 00:19:19,146
+- You work fast.
+- I work for Uncle Sam.
+
+298
+00:19:21,890 --> 00:19:25,621
+We will now vote
+on the House bill 1022—
+
+299
+00:19:25,694 --> 00:19:27,525
+the expulsion of Bob Arnold.
+
+300
+00:19:27,596 --> 00:19:31,555
+Mr. Speaker, I'm all for the bill,
+but shouldn't we tack on...
+
+301
+00:19:31,633 --> 00:19:34,397
+- a pay raise for ourselves?
+- No.!
+
+302
+00:19:38,073 --> 00:19:41,167
+Okay, this should make
+my bosses very happy.
+
+303
+00:19:41,243 --> 00:19:46,408
+- Your bosses?
+- Yep. All 250 million of them.
+
+304
+00:19:49,451 --> 00:19:51,976
+When my family arrived
+in this country four months ago...
+
+305
+00:19:52,054 --> 00:19:54,887
+we spoke no English
+and had no money in our pockets.
+
+306
+00:19:54,956 --> 00:19:59,086
+Today, we own a nationwide chain
+of wheel-balancing centers.
+
+307
+00:19:59,161 --> 00:20:02,392
+Where else but in America—
+or possibly Canada—
+
+308
+00:20:02,464 --> 00:20:05,365
+could our family find
+such opportunity?
+
+309
+00:20:05,434 --> 00:20:08,096
+That's why whenever I see
+the stars and stripes...
+
+310
+00:20:08,170 --> 00:20:12,197
+I'll always be reminded
+of that wonderful word "flag."
+
+311
+00:20:14,276 --> 00:20:17,541
+There will be a brief recess
+while the judges tabulate their votes.
+
+312
+00:20:17,612 --> 00:20:20,206
+Lisa, what's
+gotten into you?
+
+313
+00:20:20,282 --> 00:20:23,046
+Yeah, your other speech
+was a little more crowd pleasing.
+
+314
+00:20:23,118 --> 00:20:27,885
+I'm sorry, Dad.
+I couldn't think of a nice way
+to say America stinks.
+
+315
+00:20:27,956 --> 00:20:31,016
+Extra! Extra!
+Feds nab rotten rep.
+
+316
+00:20:31,093 --> 00:20:33,027
+Give me one of those.
+
+317
+00:20:33,095 --> 00:20:37,191
+"Imprisoned congressman
+becomes born-again Christian. "
+
+318
+00:20:37,265 --> 00:20:41,031
+I can't believe it.
+The system works.
+
+319
+00:20:46,942 --> 00:20:50,343
+- He already sang this song.
+- No, that was about the budget gap.
+
+320
+00:20:50,412 --> 00:20:52,039
+This is the trading gap.
+
+321
+00:20:53,482 --> 00:20:55,882
+And now
+the moment of truth.
+
+322
+00:20:55,951 --> 00:21:00,684
+Will the winning essay be
+" Bubble on, O melting pot"?
+
+323
+00:21:00,756 --> 00:21:03,657
+"Lift high your lamp,
+Green Lady"?
+
+324
+00:21:03,725 --> 00:21:06,558
+"USA, A-OK"?
+
+325
+00:21:06,628 --> 00:21:09,256
+Or "Cesspool on the Potomac"?
+
+326
+00:21:09,331 --> 00:21:12,300
+Cesspool! Cesspool! Cesspool!
+Cesspool! Cesspool!
+
+327
+00:21:12,367 --> 00:21:14,801
+And now the winner is...
+
+328
+00:21:14,870 --> 00:21:18,101
+" USA, A-OK,"
+by Trong Van Dinh.
+
+329
+00:21:18,173 --> 00:21:20,403
+D'oh!
+
+330
+00:21:23,111 --> 00:21:26,239
+Miss Crowley, thank you
+for this oversized novelty check.
+
+331
+00:21:26,314 --> 00:21:29,841
+I would like share this honor
+with all of my fellow essayists...
+
+332
+00:21:29,918 --> 00:21:32,887
+particularly
+the courageous Lisa Simpson...
+
+333
+00:21:32,954 --> 00:21:35,149
+whose inflammatory
+rhetoric reminded us...
+
+334
+00:21:35,223 --> 00:21:38,715
+that the price of freedom
+is eternal vigilance.
+
+335
+00:21:38,794 --> 00:21:41,888
+Give her the check!
+
+336
+00:21:41,963 --> 00:21:43,954
+I was serious.
+
+337
+00:21:57,445 --> 00:21:59,913
+- Ow.!
+- Bart!
+
+338
+00:21:59,981 --> 00:22:03,439
+Lis, you taught me to stand up
+for what I believe in.
+
+339
+00:22:52,712 --> 00:22:54,646
+Shh!
+
diff --git a/tests/subliminal_patch/test_mods.py b/tests/subliminal_patch/test_mods.py
new file mode 100644
index 000000000..f742b1c0e
--- /dev/null
+++ b/tests/subliminal_patch/test_mods.py
@@ -0,0 +1,16 @@
+import pytest
+import os
+from subliminal_patch import Subtitle
+
+
[email protected]
+def test_file(data):
+    return os.path.join(data, "subs_for_mods.srt")
+
+
+def test_apply_mods_remove_hi(languages, test_file):
+    sub = Subtitle(languages["en"], mods=["remove_HI", "OCR_fixes"])
+    with open(test_file, "rb") as f:
+        sub.content = f.read()
+
+    assert sub.get_modified_content(debug=True)